Are You a Victim of Gaslighting? Here Are Tell-Tale Signs That You Are Being Manipulated

Gaslighting is never acceptable from any angle, and for psychotherapists, it’s a serious matter to be dealt with. It happens when a person tries to persuade you into another way of thinking, oftentimes convincing you that you are losing touch with what’s real, so in short, you are being manipulated.

Through time, repeated gaslighting will make you feel that you really can’t trust your own gut and chances are, you’ll take whatever it is that you are told. While you may have heard of this concept in casual conversations, it’s a problem that should be addressed because victims don’t easily recognize that they are under a spell.

Pretending to Be Concerned

Most gaslighters tend to show their victims that they care for them, especially for their psychological health but in reality, it’s actually the opposite. For instance, they will underline how ‘disturbing’ it is that you can’t find your wallet, thereby prompting you to be anxious.

Thiago Barletta/Unsplash — They may show that they are concerned

But the truth is that they hid it from you, and the worst part is that you had no idea that they did that. Along the way, you’ll think that you’re not in the right mind or you’re vulnerable so you just keep questioning yourself.

Denying What’s True

It’s impossible to think that people can lie or hide information from you. But small or big, deception is deception. Gaslighters tend to cover up a lot of things from you make you question your own intuition.

For instance, they may insist that something didn’t happen when you perfectly remember what really transpired. They may also assert that you did something crazy yesterday when you really didn’t – in short, they want to sow the seed of self-doubt in you.

Criticizing Seeking Help

Gaslighters can make you feel that seeking help validates their speculations that you really are mentally ill. They may also say that you are ‘unfixable’ and that no professional can ever help you become well again.

Use Feeling Against You

It isn’t wrong to feel emotional or down sometimes, so people telling you that you’re crazy or a wreck just because of how you feel is downright gaslighting. Expressing anger, sadness, frustration, or fear will be used against you by these vile individuals.

Ben White/Unsplash — People will often invalidate how you feel

They will tell you how unreasonable you are or how irrational your feelings are. Because of this, you often have to apologize for how you feel.

Isolate You from Others

What gaslighters often do is to separate you from your support group. They will manipulate you into thinking that your friends and family are backstabbing you or are fed up with you when in fact, that has never been the case.

Zohre Nemati/Unsplash — They will take you away from your supporters

Some even go as far as talking to your peers and telling them about your problems, prompting your friends to ask you if you’re OK. The question, while they mean well, is enough to make you feel that something really is wrong.